randomous and probably meaningless

some random updates:

——-

i tripped and fell right over at work last thursday. and it has to do with the fact that i have not had time to go shopping (nor have the money) for myself. any pants i’m wearing is depending on the one belt i have to keep people from seeing what colour of underwear i’m wearing that day.

so i was wearing this one with big cuffs on the bottom. i was in a rush and accidentally got my heel from one foot caught in the cuff of the opposite leg.

i don’t think i need to further explain what happened right then and there. lets just say that i was lying flat on my face with co-workers rushing over in extreme fear that i had broken my ankle or something.

i was fine, really. just a very hurt ego and a suffering of extreme embarrassment. my glasses, btw, also flew off and i had to ask my co-worker closest to me to help me fetch it.

it’s hard to find one’s glasses when there’s no way of knowing which way it flung to – being blind as a bat doesn’t help either.

you would think that this would be the worst part of the story but no… because you see, this EXACT same thing happened last year which prompted me to remind myself back then that i can’t wear those pants anymore.

last year, no one saw me fall so it wasn’t as bad. you would think that the stinging of that fall would have taught me a lesson. but… i conveniently forgot about it. sure, i did remember some odd memory nagging me at the back of my mind to not wear those pants. i’m not sure what the reason is here – old age or selective memory?

unfortunately, it was only after the repeat, REPLICATED accident in which i remembered why.

——-

hobbes is a unique dog. he’s smart. too smart. about twice a week, at most, we leave him in his kennel during the day. as i prepare the kennel before leaving – with his water bowl and toys – he will go right inside afterwards to retrieve any and all of the toys, all the while whining away.

it’s like a protest – “the toys stay out and SO DO I!”

——-

i admit my blog entries have been incredibly boring. that’s probably because i have no life outside of chauffering both a kid and dog around, as well as devote all my free time to my household where everything is mainly about them and very little about me.

i sound bitter, don’t i? i probably am. but you have to believe me – i’m trying to get over it and bring back a more positive attitude.

i’m just grumpy because it was a tough morning – and i didn’t need that on my first day back to work after my vacation.

the thing is, though, that i know i am blessed with the family, friends, a dog that seems to outsmart me, manager and even some co-workers that help to keep me sane on a day to day basis. money and time is extremely tight these days – but all in all, we are still wealthy in the grand scheme of things. perhaps not monetary wealth and while money is important, it’s not the key to happiness.

it’s just been really hard to catch my breath. if it’s not one thing, it’s another – one crisis is over and another one takes it’s place. i’m getting better at rolling with the punches but there are days where it’s just very dark for me – like i wonder how long i can keep going like this.

doug, however, gave me a card on monday – a little something to wish me a happy anniversary.

and while my husband is not one of many words, he does seem to find the right type of card with just the perfect saying very fitting of whatever moment of our lives we find ourselves battling in.

anyway, i don’t have the card with me. i wish i did. i would write it out here, word for word. but basically, it said that no matter how crazy life is, we’ll pull through it together. and that regardless, he’s happy to be having this life with me.

it was EXACTLY the descriptive words needed to shed some light into much frustration and sorrow i’ve been experiencing.

i found the card on my pillow – i was alone when i read it and i balled my eyes out because i was just so touched by it.

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5 thoughts on “randomous and probably meaningless

  1. I’m glad your husband came through for you. It goes a long way to have someone try to understand how you feel.

    Being a mom and a wife is a huge sacrifice, and being a grown up can be tough sometimes. I remember when I was single I worked four days a week, and spent my three days off doing NOTHING. Going for coffee, shopping, taking creative classes, working out, reading. Being a wife and mom is exactly what I wanted, but it’s not always easy and you sure don’t have much time for yourself.

  2. First, the pants. I am so sorry that you fell in front of your coworkers. ugggg. You are going to give the pants to goodwill, right? If not, cut the legs of the pants off so you will remember not to wear them 😀

    Happy Anniversary!! Sounds like you got a very special card!

    Hobbes sounds darling. When I start getting the kennel ready, Chloe comes out and lays down on the dog bed because she does not go into the kennel. In the meantime, Livvy backs away and looks at me like I am hurting her feelings terribly be even thinking of putting her in there! Poor girl. When she is older and more trustworthy, I won’t mind leaving her out with her sister.

    • lol! that’s about the best, creative advice i’ve received regarding the pants. 🙂

      the thing is – i loved those pants. they were khaki and comfy and still not looking like it is worn-out. *sigh* while i am tempted to cut them like you suggested for the sheer fun of it, i will do the right thing. donate them to good will (or some place similar).

      my thoughts are aligned with yours in regards to hobbes. i’m looking forward to the day where we can start leaving him in the kitchen (removing garbade can and chairs) because we have a door that closes the kitchen off from the rest of the house. he still may not love the idea of being left alone but he tends to not complain about being alone in the kitchen as much. i’ve had to do it for short periods of time (45min or less) if i’m working out in the basement or needing to get chaeli ready in a hurry and can’t afford to have him always under our feet.

      he stands by the glass windor of the door and stares as i leave (sometimes some minor whining) but when i come back down, he is always just chilling out on his matt. not stressed at all.

      the weirdest thing is that he is fine with sleeping in his kennel at night. go figure.

  3. It’s not you, it’s those damn cuffs on the pants. I almost took a tumble down a flight a stairs at work because of cuffed slacks. While walking down the stairs, the heel of my right foot got caught in the cuff of the other foot. I grabbed onto the railing in time to avoid major embarrassment and possibly a broken nose and some missing teeth. I took those pants to the tailor and got the cuffs removed for about $10.

    Girl, get yourself to the mall or I’m going to have to nominate you for What Not to Wear. That show is full of moms who don’t make time for themselves. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your family, right?!

    • i think i just need to get rid of those pants. period. 🙂

      i actually did take 3 work days off, making it a 6-day, extended long weekend to have some me-time. it’s just that when it came time to choose between shopping and lazying around, the 2nd option was just too tempting to give up! :p

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