I know a lot of people complain about their own mother’s annoying, obsessive behavior. I know I am not alone when dealing with a lifetime of never feeling like I will ever have a normal, healthy relationship with my mother.
This isn’t another rant of oh-how-my-mom-is-driving-me-crazy. I most definitely have written such venting, desperate, plea for relief type posts here. But this time, it’s about how in some sad, twisted way, my mother’s relentless, stubbornness has actually become a source of happiness for me.
Wait… no. Let me clarify. Nothing of her obsessiveness actually makes me happy. It’s just… well… let me give you an example.
My mom prides herself on saving money. And to be quite fair, she is good at putting away cash for a rainy day. However, she’s not REALLY great at saving money. Behind this facade is the need to always get a great bang for a buck.
Take one of our local pubs. They have daily specials and on Wednesday, they have their 10oz Angus steak for $15. It comes with two sides. And while we’re not talking about the best chophouse even at the level of a franchise monster like The Keg, I have to admit, for a quick fix on mid-week steak crave, it does the trick.
We plan on going to dinner at this pub after our daughter’s music night performance. I knew my parents would be game going to this pub. It’s decent food, large quantities and for a great price. Service… so-so. I mean, when we go for brunch, the service is amazing. For dinner? Not that the service is horrible, but twice I ordered their Australian Cabernet Sauvignon only to get some type of white wine. I mean, come on! Cab-sav? Who doesn’t know that is clearly a red?
My dad and I are both carnivores. Our weakness will always be steaks. So going to this pub for their Wednesday night steak special is a no brainer. It’s a school night and we’ll be in and out with our tummies fed.
My mom, however, isn’t so much of a steak-lover. She likes it, but her weakness is something she doesn’t get at home. Pub style nachos. She’s a sucker for them. But because the special for that night is a really good deal when you consider a saving of $13 for their steaks as any other night it will cost $28 for the 10 oz-er, my mom states she will get the steak as well.
I look at her and ask, “But you like nachos.”
She replies matter-of-factually, “The steaks are a very good deal!”
“Mom, the nachos are $14. You’ll be saving yourself a dollar. You don’t even like steaks that much.”
“But the nachos are always $14. The steaks are a good deal that night!”
Of course, by this point, I’ve lost interest in trying to reason with her.
This is just a small smidgen example of what is pretty much her constant state. Magnify this by 25 and you’re much closer to what it is like to live in my mother’s world.
I haven’t even gotten to that time she went on a cruise to Alaska and the one night they served lobster tails was the same day my mom was feeling motion sickness. But she had to get her money’s worth and since the meals are all included and not limited to just one order, she ordered two and force-fed herself to finish every last bite.
Before leaving the table, she threw up her entire dinner right there at the table. Not only did she spoil her evening, but all those around her probably didn’t enjoy that sight (or smell) as well.
Get the picture?
And where was I going with this?
Oh yes. Right. So while I think my mom is completely crazed to live her life this way, it’s given us, my husband and I, many entertaining conversations with good laughs between some moments of frustration.
I can’t change the way my mom is. But I certainly can make the most of it.