baby showers – how to play the games

i went to a friend’s baby shower this past sunday – it was lovely. the setting, the decorations, the food… i was thankful B was there. I didn’t know many of the people and a few that i did know, i’m not that close to. either way, afternoon tea is always something i enjoy – regardless of who i know.

with some one who struggles with anxiety/depression disorder, it’s weird that i’m perfectly content to sit on my own and daydream away in the middle of a room of strangers. it’s a gift, i suppose. not that i willingly put myself into that type of situation – it’s just a gift in that if i do find myself surrounded by strangers and no one seems interested in talking with me, i always have that ‘escape’ option that i’ve become good at over the years.

anyway, i’m horrible at those baby shower games. i basically have never won – which is fine. but yeah – it’s the one area where my competitive nature gives up because i know it’s hopeless.

the hardest game this past sunday was to name a word related to babies (and early years motherhood) for every letter of the alphabet. in three minutes. the hint was that the most unique words would win us more points.

okay. easy enough.

except that it wasn’t. it was hard. it was… like… making us THINK! on a SUNDAY! at a PARTY! while drinking TEA! and AFTER stuffing our faces with finger sandwiches and tasty pastries – the blood was already working on my digestion and no where near my brain.

when the hostess told us to start, i stared at the letter A intensely. i know the idea was to come up with a unique word – but at that point, i couldn’t even come up with any common words!

so… i did the best i could. i wrote down, ‘anal thermometer.’

when the hostess came to collect our answers, she then explained she would give us some one else’s paper and we would ‘grade’ the words together. to my horror, mine got passed to an older lady (a relative – i think an aunt) sitting RIGHT across from me.

was i really about to be the cause of this older, possibly conservative, chinese lady to have to say the word ‘anal’ at her niece’s baby shower?

now, i will admit. part of me was curious – curious to the reactions and you know, maybe baby showers don’t need to be so conservative and traditional. after all, i followed the rules and ‘anal thermometer’ can be related to babies since it is one of two options on how to take their temperature (yes, i know – with technology being as easy as going to our local pharmacy store, you can get those battery operated ones you stick in the ear… but the anal option, since it’s to unsafe to take their temperature orally at that age, IS the most accurate way to get a good reading of their internal body temperature).

the other part of me wanted to crawl under a rock and die. i am so much more conservative now that i am older and, well, a mother. but the fear of my past reputation – the catalyst for certain ‘trouble’ at parties, started to creep back and i could feel the heat rising to my cheeks as i was about to be exposed to these strangers of what type of person i use to be.

well, turns out that everyone had a good laugh. including the lady that had to read it – actually, i think she even enjoyed shouting it out.

for the letter B, i played it safe. i put down ‘bibs’ but in my mind, i was actually thinking, blistering nipples.

annual smoked rib fest 2011

I’ve been in a pork-coma since yesterday afternoon. It was worth it though.

Doug woke up at 5:30am to get both the smoke ribs and pulked-pork on its way to what would be the best he’s ever cooked up – for both! And while we do have some leftovers, I was glad to see it wasn’t a crazy amount.

One thing I love to see as a hostess – it’s not just wanting everyone to have a good time, but to see them enjoying the food… Simply blissful!

I really missed all my friends. I’ve seen ‘pockets’ of them but not all together for a very long time.

Being with them is a gentle reminder to keep the balance.

Anyway, looking forward to continuing this tradition… Even though it leaves the house smelling like smoked meat for the remainder of the week!

party, party, party

when my manager wished me a good weekend at the end of friday, he asked me what my plans were…

i didn’t bother telling him that doug would be gone both days – he’s currently, as we speak, practising scenerios in what they call a burn tower. basically, the building is lit on fire and they learn methods of estinguishing the flames. it’s part of the practical portion of his course which he loves.

but i don’t know why i didn’t tell my manager – i suppose i was afraid it might turn out to seem like i’m venting/whining. which i’m not really. i’m happy for doug – but i would admit that i wish it were just one day because i do really love having him home. especially on sunday’s.

anyway, so i said to my boss, “nothing much.”

he replied, “that’s good!”

“well, just one party. tomorrow night.”

“parties… again. you guys always have some party going on.”

“well, tame parties. like the ones that end no later then 10pm.”

somewhat not always true – they can go late but i knew we would have to leave early on the account of doug’s early sunday morning and the fact that hobbes would need some relief before 11pm.

but not completely untrue when compared to the days of coming home at 6:30am. seriously. it hurts just remembering those days. it physically hurts. no amount of coffee could mend an all-nighter like that. these days, i would have to take at least half of week’s vacation just to recooperate.

anyway – while we’re missing doug this weekend, we’ve been doing what we can.

yesterday it was kenpo in the morning, cleaned the bathrooms and the master bedroom, open house for chaeli’s grade two of next school year (which i’m not even ready to think about so, in hindsight, wasn’t really into the open house – as impressive as it was), took hobbes to a new dog park (which the volunteers covered with these big wood chips – note to volunteers: if you want your dogs to run around and play, pieces of wood just makes them want to lie down and chew on them) and then home until doug got home.

the party last night was fun. but i’m finding that because of how busy we are, i’m loosing concentration at around 9pm. it’s not always like that but last night, it certainly was.

anyway, i think my favourite conversation last night went something like this:

me: “yeah, i really wish some of the other husbands were participating in movember.”

friend: “i think it’s a great awareness.”

other friend: “yeah – it’s sweet that he’s doing it.”

me: “but that’s the point. if he was actually doing it for the awareness, i would totally understand. but he’s only doing this because it gives him the excuse that he just can!”

it’s the honest truth, i’m afraid.

here we go again

it’s that time of year again – facing the daily grind after labour day weekend.

while i’m ready for a change of season, i’m slightly saddened to see summer end.

having said that, i have plans for the fall. or more to the point, the fall weekends. we have a very short autumn season here. the leaves change into beautiful shades of red, orange, and yellow. but… with a blink of an eye, theses colours seem to go as fast as they come. so, for about five to six weeks, it’s important to plan our weekends well.

i do plan on a couple of hiking trips. we always seem to get one in – this year, we’re aiming for two. with a possible 2-night stay over the weekend up in the northern penensula of bruce trail. another hike will probably be close to the niagara area. and of course, here is always some local trails nearby.

as usual, we’ll head out to the green belt to visit a farm (usually to pick a pumpkin for halloween). this will normally be our last fall adventure.

to start, we’ve got chaeli’s first week in grade one this week, followed by a smoked meat bbq party we’ll be hosting this saturday.

i’m sure, before we know it, christmas will be just around the bend.

half vacation – half staycation

we planned our camping trip to only take part for half of the week on purpose – it allowed us to have somewhat of a staycation. of course, when it comes to camping, you do need a day or two to unpack, re-store equipment, do loads of laundry… there’s somewhat more work.

still – in between all the work, it’s been nice to go at a slower pace and to not have a routine for a couple of days.

in fact, i regret not doing a staycation earlier this summer – just a week where we can do just this. it’s somewhat surreal for me but also extremely relaxing. i would say that it’s even more relaxing then any vacation because no planning and organizing is involved.

i’ve got a 3 more days before going back to work. aside from a house warming party with good friends, we don’t have anything planned this weekend.

so… i’ll get to do a bodypump class. and some yoga and/or a bodyflow class.

and watch some movies on dvd.

reading… definitely some reading as well.

ah summer. you’ve been good to us. it’s definitely hard to let you go so soon.

two things

i'm not pregnant.

i got my period yesterday morning.

two weekends ago, chaeli was staying over at my parents' place. and doug and i were being careless. since then, it was two weeks of waiting – another week and i would have done a home pregnancy test.

the truth is that i'm very relieved. about two years ago, we decided that if it hadn't happen by then, it won't ever happen. and since it didn't happen, we were content with the notion that it was never meant to be.

anyway…

this period came in good time. not that it was something i've been stressing about. but it was one thing slightly and gently nagging at the back of my mind. having the issue resolve itself put me more at ease for last night's bbq party we hosted for good friends. doug grilled chicken thighs and drumsticks – marinated in this dijon-rosemary recipe i found years ago. he also bought both pork ribs and beef ribs – smoked the two. it made the men very happy.

we had, i would definitely say, a fantastic night.

the laughs and talks for me, were like one of those nights i'll always cherish when i look back on. it felt good. thats probably the best way to describe it. and of course, as always, i felt blessed to have such long-time friends.

it really does make a difference in one's life. it made me feel… wealthy.

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kiss and tell! ;)

a couple of nights ago, i had a dream where i was heading into the supermarket. just outside, there was this young woman – i would say she was a little bit punk. she had tattoos, funky hair, a nose ring and definitely had an edge to her.

anyway, she was crying. so i went up to her and asked her if she was okay. without any warning, she flung herself into my arms and started to sob hysterically.

i never got the story out of her but i felt a huge rush of empathy for her sorrows.

after calming her down, we started to talk about other things. we were holding hands and flirting with one another like crazy. it didn't take long for me to cup her face and give her a  kiss on her lips.

i woke up then and while i couldn't remember the details of her face anymore, i knew that it was violca.

violca was this young lady i met ten years ago at a party. she was a dj back then – i have no idea what she's up to these days. anyway, when i arrived at the party, not knowing anyone except for mad-boy (who dragged me there), plus rvx and tai (who i dragged with me), she came up to me shortly and said, "hi! you're shy, right?"

i was taken aback a bit. after answering that yes, indeed that's who i am, i inquired how she knew. apparently, mad-boy had sent all his friends the link to my website back then.

ah. so they all knew me way more then i knew them. :)

anyway – i had to admit, violca was very cool. she wasn't an obvious beauty you would pick out from the room but the girl had a quality to her that was hard to ignore. perhaps her confidence was part of her sex appeal. it wasn't over-bearing, either. it was, i would say… grounded but very present. not cocky, not show-y and definitely did not feel the need to be part of the spotlight. and yet, she was definitely always on the edge of the spotlight – a force to be reckoned with.

i suppose i had one too many drinks. and she didn't hide her attraction towards me. closer to the end of the night, i did exactly to her as what i did to this young symbolic woman who represented her from my dreams – i reached out, cupped her face and kissed her. just for a moment or two.

and you know what? she kissed better then most guys i've kissed.

don't ask me how many i've kissed, either. it's an embarrassing amount (like, waaaaay more then necessary).

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ghetto up-bringing, best friends and weird dreams

this past saturday, we went to di and rick's place for a get-together. better yet, ada and hoa were back for a visit from vancouver so having them there with us just felt so good.

anyway, ssq whom i befriended around the same time i befriended cathy in grade 7, was talking about how ghetto we were growing up back in the hood (nickname for scarborough). to think – our childhood memories consisted of going to the movies where our parents would sneak in popcorn and pop cans as to avoid buying the food there. i know – that's not really ghetto but for us, living in canada, that's about as ghetto as it gets.

that and having birthday parties at mcdonald. ghetto.

now, rvx's wife, taryne, grew up in the high park area – very opposite of ghetto. and while she protested to the lifestyle differences, ssq explained it beautifully with the following…

ssq: when we were in miami, there was a place where you could swim with the dolphin. it cost $160 to actually swim with them. if you sat on the dock and have them swim up to you, so you could pet them, it was $80. and then, there were these people behind the fence with a video cam, watching and filming the dolphins…

me: let me guess – that's what we represent. scarborough people. we're the ones behind the fence.

ssq. exactly! because you know our parents would have said, "why would you want to pay $160 if you can see them from here???"

and with that, we high-fived each other. i'm not really sure why – it's nothing to be proud of. but the fact that we weren't alone on this and that we truly understand the meaning behind being brought up in scarborough, was a bonding factor.

anyway, i had a crazy dream that night. and it pertains to what happened during the party. cathy's sweet H came in from swimming in the pool. he was in the middle of the kitchen when he announced, "i'm going to take my pants off now!"

cathy looked a bit mortified and she tried to tell him not to. but being the shit-disturbers we were, the rest of us told him to go ahead.

before this happened, we also had a conversation where we agreed that H took after his father, greg.

and it was that exact moment, when H was bare-bottomed in di's kitchen when i asked, "and is this something that greg would do as well?"

to which ssq replied, "i don't know but he better not do that in our kitchen!"

so anyway, that night, i dreamt that it wasn't H who decided to take his pants off, but ssq. and a mob of us screamed out, "nooooo! some one stooooop hiiiiiiim!!!"

very disturbing dream indeed.

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enjoying the march sun while it lasts

we had a gorgeous weekend of sunshine! a much needed type of sunshine and almost spring-like weather after days and days of winter grey. and we've got a lot of rain coming up the end of this week, dumping down for most of next week as well. i think saturday is calling for 15-20mm of rain. they're forecasting for just one dry day with partial sun for next week. and then another snowfall. crazy weather. i should be use to it. but i'm not. not completely.

anyway, this past weekend, on the saturday, we went to cathy's son's 3rd birthday party. they had it at their house with a very cool visit from u-hoo the clown. she came to her daughter's 5th birthday party. as mentioned before, i'm not a big fan of clowns but this clown was different. she's not made up in a scary way and has the most sweetest and most charming personality! with a cute giggle and witty remarks, the kids just ate her up! chaeli, especially was almost right by u-hoo the entire time.

as for the party itself, the adult side, i was actually enjoying it quite a bit. i even felt like myself and almost forgot about how sad i've been feeling lately. i suppose i don't want to jinx myself but maybe this fog is lifting and i'll be able to feel good again.

on sunday, we woke up earlier then normal and headed down to high park where doug went for a run while chaeli and i visited the zoo (have to visit the highland 'coos' – scottish cows, in other words) and then to the castle-playground. i forgot my camera, which is just as well. it's somewhat muddy and grey there and will look much more gorgeous in the spring time.

here's some photos from last spring:

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poutine, canadian bacon and GOLD!

our friends, steve and cor, really seem to know how to throw a party.

or, more specifically, they really seem to know how to feed us! that alone, makes it a worthwhile event.

but of course, the biggest focus yesterday was our gold win in the men's hockey. i apologize to my american friends who might read this – but this is a big deal for us. and honestly, i have to say that it could have gone either way. both teams were bringing it BIG time yesterday. but because the rivalry is huge, and us canadians have endured years of being in the shadow of the big eagle (and having to deal with the endless jokes on our expense and the stereotypes and myths about a country that's really, just next door), we are glowing this morning. of course, individual americans are not like this – not those that i know. but as a nation, it's been tiring getting that type of ribbing from another nation as a whole. for the most part, we just try to take it with a grain of salt, but i for one, have been annoyed with it many times in the past. 

we don't get a lot of glorious moments. this was more of a relief. like a big WHEW! and of course, it just makes it even more awesome to be a canadian this morning. :)

however, my pride does go beyond the gold medal win. it's about how we achieved a personal best. and how individual athletes achieved their personal bests, even if they didn't get the gold or place a medal even. my pride is about how we came together as a nation – how even across the country, we were showing our support to our athletes.  

and of course, the sportsmanship. and the inclusion to not let others feel left out. or the fact that our indentity was never lost but how over the years, we have discovered that we can still be strong as a nation with such diverse cultures – all of which are not ignored or forced into some type of simulation.

even the coverage was outstanding. three canadian channels – CTV, sportsnet and TSN – huge rivals on any given day, put their differences aside and worked together to cover the event. so while one was covering one event, they would let us viewers know which channel to tune into if we're looking for a different event occurring at the same time. i can not tell you how much smoother it was for us this time around. in fact, while this might have heppened in other hosted-countries, i've never experienced this type of team work before. it worked. it worked well. and was, in my oppinion, the best coverage ever!

anyway, back to an equally important topis… as for the food, this was the canadian olympic menu:

  • spinach salad with peameal bacon
  • maple-garlic chicken wings
  • turkey chili with beer
  • poutine (fries, gravy and melted cheese curd)
  • and of course, lots of molson canadian beer (because, after all, I.AM.CANADAIN!)

we started eating around 3pm and didn't stop for mainly three hours.

yeah – no dinner was needed after that. :)

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